In my last blog post (ahem… probably written about three months ago, just before school let out), I wrote about end-of-the-year traditions. It was bittersweet. Once in a while, I still shed a tear for good, ol’ breakdancin’ Mr. Martin.
Now, after a long and overly-productive summer “break,” I find myself in front of a desktop computer once again and severely in denial. In denial about summer being over, losing the warm weather, losing my relative freedom, and having to put my toes back in shoe jail. Or would that be foot jail?
Either way, it sucks.
However, I’ve lived long enough on this blasted sphere to know at least a few things about myself. In particular, I need a motherfuckin’ reason to keep going (beyond, you know, the whole biological imperative to see my children to relative adulthood).
What, as an adult, seems to keep me looking forward to the near-future (as opposed to the sweet embrace of death)?
Yes, it’s nice to notice the leaves begin their first, tentative earthward descents. Sure, it’s nice to get a break from the searing heat of summer in high desert. It’s also great to keep fantasizing about food, beer, candy, and more food!
Oh, yeah, baby. It’s time to drink some actual beer. Apologies to beer snobs out there; I wish I could be one, but it will always baffle me how you can drink a triple IPA or a chocolate stout after mowing the lawn. No, my friends, summer is all about lagers, pilsners, and cheap, American swill.
Now, I can drink a vaguely sweet amber ale without cringing. Now, I can look at a stout without getting that sickly salivation feeling in the back of my throat. Now, I can drink what I want!
Some Like it Hot
Changing temperatures also mean I don’t have to eat salad, hard-boiled eggs from the fridge, and ice water at every meal. I can quit running from the shower to the freezer in a vain attempt to halt the production of sweat, eventually pulling my undies from the freezer and cautiously stepping into them. I can make chili! Wifey can make her famous squash soup! We can wear sweaters and long pants and even keep up the sandal charade for a few more months (nights and weekends, anyway). We can eat french fries during…
Fire Up the Ol’ Gridiron!
…FOOTBALL SEASON! I know Tom has my back on this one. Football season approacheth. Your favorite team sucks. Mine rocks. Regardless of recent performance or any amount of quarterbacks lost for political activism.
By the way, who’s your team? College? Pro? Just name one.
Halloweeeeeen! I’m sure most children-turned-adults-turned-parents find their Halloween-related arc looking something like this:
- This is weird, but the folks want to walk around at night, so…
- This is awesome! Free candy!!
- This is pretty cool. A night away from the parents and plenty of distractions around the ‘hood…
- Okay, they quit giving me candy. Guess I’d better hang out with my zitty friends at 7-11.
- I’m in college! Let’s drink and be naked!
- … (for ten or fifteen years)…
- I can’t wait to take the kids trick or treating! What should we dress them up as this year? Pebbles and Bam-Bam? Bart and Maggie?! SIMON AND GARFUNKLE!!!
So, yeah, Garrett and I are pretty stoked for Halloweener. He wants to be “the bones,” which is a skeleton (in lay terms). He also wants to be a Ninja Turtle, Batman, a mummy, a dinosaur, one of those obnoxious little rats on Miniforce (the worst children’s show ever… check it out!), and probably three other things we see at the costume store the day of.
Spoiler: we’re probably forcing the kids to do the pebbles and bam-bam thing. Pics to follow!
‘Tis the Season
And, of course, Fall transitions so nicely (and so consistently) into Winter, bringing even more traditions. A gigantic, inappropriately huge Thanksgiving meal with family and football. Bundling up to shovel the driveway. Staying indoors by our gas stove. Christmas lights and cookies. Chilly walks around the block while batches of Kelly’s browned butter chocolate chip cookies bake. The prospect of seeing family (and maybe even enjoying ourselves).
Auld Lang Zyne
That phrase is as difficult to spell as the word Hannukah (Channukah… Chewbacca…).
Anyway, there’s always New Year’s Eve. Those wacky traditions. Watching black and white Twilight Zone episodes with wifey. Champagne. Staying up late… some years we even wake back up and make it ’til midnight.
Yes, there’s New Year’s Eve… and the feeling we’ve been doing the same thing for… how many years now?
Then, we wake up New Year’s Day and do it all again. Until next New Year’s Day. And the next. And so on.
I don’t think this post really has an ending. I suppose that’s appropriate, given the revelation of how frustratingly predictable my life is, but that’s only when viewed through the macro perspective. In reality, life is every. Fucking. Day. It’s hard. It also flies by quickly.
I fear that some day, I’ll wake up from my spot on the floor, wondering what happened to my life, only to be greeted by a golfer, a professional sketch artist, and Wu.
Rarely do I get much feedback from my readership (beyond the faithful three or four or five of you… thanks, by the way), so I’m going to do my best to open it up to YOU!
TE TOCA A TI!
What are you favorite fall traditions? What keeps you moving through the year? What do you look forward to?! What day or week or month do you absolutely dread?!
Sound off! I demand it! If nothing else, at least say a little something about beer.