Beer Viking rapes, pillages, is available for children’s parties and village clam-bakes

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I haven’t gotten excited about a Halloween costume since… I don’t know… probably when I was old enough to have my mom assemble a costume for me. Never in my personal history have I worked at creating a costume; in the past, it had either been assembling random thrift store purchases, or simply buying a costume. Most years, I never even dress up.

NOT THIS YEAR, FRIENDS! I got so excited about a viking. But not any ordinary viking or even barbarian posing as a viking. I got excited about beer viking. What is beer viking, you ask?

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A viking who raises awareness about fermented beverages?

A purveyor of beverages who alternatively rapes, pillages, and quaffs ales?

An incorruptible ideal, like Batman or BOGO deals?

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Perhaps all of the above. But one thing is certain: now that the beer viking costume has been made and worn publicly, it’s time to start hitting up local breweries and seeing if I can get paid in beer to wear this costume again and again, as I harass their weary patrons who are simply after a quiet drink.

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Happy Halloween to all, and to all a good night!

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Bottoms up, bitches!
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2 thoughts on “Beer Viking rapes, pillages, is available for children’s parties and village clam-bakes”

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